A Duck for a Reward

The other day we took our daughter to the doctor for her 18 months examination. It is quite different this time around as she has grown up enough to know her surroundings and exert resistance wherever she is made uncomfortable. Personalities develop as they grow. It was so much easier for us to tackle her when she was younger, but now we have to be at war with her for making her sit through the procedure.

First comes the deception. Our daughter is fond of going out, she loves to go out, anywhere, doesn’t matter, just out of the house and she is a happy camper. She just doesn’t want to get back home. So obviously we told her that we are going bye bye and she was pretty happy to accompany us and was really jolly. She had no idea what was coming though.

Stripping is usually easy at home, whenever we have to change her dress. But when you are in the hospital she gets suspicious, “Hey why the hell are you stripping me off here in a strange little room. This is not good at all, something is wrong”. Still, she is happy to be in a different surrounding, something to give her a feeling that she is outside her home at some fun place. She doesn’t mind being in just the diaper and hangs around the exam room, tries to pull open the “child proofed” cupboard, skates the wheeled doctor’s chair … whee … whee…all that.

But when it comes to the Nurse and the doctor trying to perform a certain simple procedure like examining the eyes, ears, vitals she is done. She cries and yells out loud and gives the best of abilities in resisting the inevitable. The doctor promises it will be just a few easy steps and reassures her that she will get a reward in the end. What seems like an easy few steps is an ordeal for the babies as they are not used to it (only 18 months old, duh!). All through these, she threw her hands up and around so much that she would have saved quite a few baskets in a basket ball game. I guess she was feeling it like a roller coaster ride. Thankfully there were no shots(Vaccination) that day.

When all was done, it was time for the reward. I didn’t even remember that there was going to be a reward until the doctor reached for the cupboard saying “ok, now its reward time”. He pulled out a small pink plastic duck and handed it to my daughter who was still sobbing. She stopped sobbing but now gave a strange look. I guess this is what she should have been thinking:

“A duck? I sit through all your peeking around and poking over my body and all I get is a plastic pink duck. Come on dude? you don’t have anything else, how about a cell phone or an iPod? or atleast a toy phone? oh, what a rip off! I mean look, this thing can’t even make some squeeky duck noise …. I have to make quack quack quack noise on my own!”.

But for some strange reasons we only heard “Quack Quack Quack” and not the rest of the words. I imagined advising my daughter “Honey! It is not the reward that matters, It is the experience, the journey that is the reward”

She must have said “Oh, yeah you mean the car ride from home to here? yeah that was fun! better than this lame duck”

I imagined “See, you get the hang of it already. It is that easy!”

“Quack quack” said my daughter and we drove back home merrily expecting the rest of the day.

Infrastructure for Electric Cars

GM teams with utilities to develop electric car charging infrastructure - Engadget

Now that is the right direction of progress. Electric cars without the proper charging infrastructure will be pretty much useless and will not reach the masses effectively as one would have to rely mostly on the power from home. With charging station built around important places all over, will help the penetration of Electric cars whenever it gets into mainstream. GM says all this will happen by 2010 right around the time when Chevy Volt is targetted for a launch.

I have the following 2 concerns:

1. I hope this charging station is built around open standards or GM licenses it to auto manufacturers, this way we will have more Electric cars to choose from and the market will play itself towards lesser price. Open standards will allow multiple brand of cars to be compatible with the same charging station. It better be!

2. The traditional way of electricity source in US is still Coal fired plants (as much as 50% or more?). If only we start replacing that with renewal energy source we will see the full advantage of driving an electric car.

Having said this, let me also secretly hope that the Tatas will come up with a Nano electric and work with the Indian power companies and build this electric charging infrastructure. It very much seems to me like the way to go for our future.

Music Review: Sathyam

The last album of Harris Jayaraj that I really liked was from the Kamal Hassan starrer “Vettaiyadu Vilaiyadu”. Bheema had a few songs that were really good but others sounded repetitive. After that, I have to say Harris has come up with a likeable set of songs in the new album “Sathyam”, though not anything spectacular.

A peppy foot tapping number that starts with a highly meaningful word “Shabarababam” is sure trying to fish the hearts of the youth. Ada Gada is the song name and I have to say Premji Amaran has done a decent job voicing this song.This song is a Hip hop/Rap Wanna be with usual beats.

Harris Jayaraj was runaway hit when he came up with the song Vaseegara for the movie Minnale. It was fresh and the voice of Bombay Jayashree was mesmerizing. The song Chellame from this album sounds like Vaseegara yet feels fresh, new and youthful.

En anbe is soft and melodious and can put you to sleep. This is the song that I liked most from the album, even though it feels predictable and monotonous.

From the demands of the All India International Federation of Kuthu song fans comes the song Paal Pappali. This song stands out for choosing a unique opener “Paal Pappali” which means Milk Papaya. It begins with beats that sounds like the song “Uran thottathula” from Veyil and goes on with a “Sarakku vachurken” tune from Shah Jahan and sandwiches some “Maduraikku pogathadi” tunes from Azhagiya Tamil Mahan in between. Even though I sorta liked this song in the beginning, I am afraid it might lose its shine and fade away.

Un Udayam is a song for the Hero and this is the song that I didn’t like from the album. It sounds like Oru Mugamo from Bheema and is purely there to praise the character that the Hero is going to play. It doesn’t feel like a theme song, while it could have been.

Harris Jayaraj is good at background score. Movies like Kaaka Kaaka and Minnale had a fantastic background score that moulded greatly with the screenplay. I hope Harris can show some great stuff in the background score for the Movie.

The success of this album will depend on how well the movie does.

Magazines se Ethanol Tak

So I go through the usual ritual of a routine haircut at the salon the other day. I was asked to wait a few minutes for my turn and so I was sitting at the lounge area waiting. A bunch of magazines on the table were inviting me to take a peek and this is what I thought about them.

Men’s Health: Hmm… I have got a good biceps and decent triceps. Hey I even have small mountain like muscle right around my belly, so I must be in good shape. I don’t need this. Besides, it is too insulting to put a couple of Shirtless men with waxed Torso on the cover who have 6 pack abs. Why can’t they put normal men like me? This looks like some sort of Women entertainment magazine, I am skipping this.

Women’s Health: Now that is a normal looking woman. See, this is how they should project it in the cover, will bring up the reader’s self esteem. No more comments, I am skipping this.

Golf Magazine: I stand on the field and hit the ball several yards, walk all the way to get the ball and all I do is hit it again? This is what Robin Williams thought and I think the same. To me, Golf is too boring. Besides, I would rather fight for using the land for cultivating wheat and feed the hungry in Africa.

Parenting Magazine: Now this is outrageous. Do they think I am a terrible parent that I need a magazine to improve my parenting skills. Sure I may have allowed some stunts but still I am good father! I am going to burn effigies of scissors and trimmers, I will burn the magazines, heck I will burn old tyres if can’t burn anything. Well, I wasn’t in India so I can’t do all these. Breathe in … Breathe out … Skipping this.

Car Magazine: Ah! finally they got me. I love cars, I am a formula 1 fan. Finally something I like and so I picked it up. Turn the pages, and my eyes fall right on an article on Ethanol. “To feed the hungry in Africa, you need to blow away your SUV” says the title. “800 Million people in US need fuel, while 800 million in Africa are deprived off their food” it said something like that, I can’t remember the exact sentence.

Ethanol is considered a blunder in alternative fuel by Environmentalist as too many farmlands are converted for cultivating Corn which is the source of Ethanol. This leads to the decrease in production of food crops causing inflation and price rise of crops like Rice, Wheat. The end result is someone who cannot afford high prices, going hungry. Of course the other side of the group which supports Ethanol, thinks that the world level inflation and rise in food prices is uneffected by ethanol, and is actually due to other reasons. I had already written a small article on Going Green vs Going Hungry. You can also read the Food vs Fuel debate in detail over here - Wikipedia: Food vs Fuel.

At any cost, we shouldn’t sacrifice our fuel for the body over fuel for our locomotion. This is my opinion. We can’t drive if we don’t exist, can we? So obviously my stand is to oppose the use of Ethanol (and may be those gas guzzling SUVs, but no leave the F1 Cars alone). But as an Individual, we can make a difference by choosing what we need. If we pick the right thing then the market will automatically respond to it. If we use lesser fuel, cut down our commutes, make simple choices in life things will fall in place. Our actions can influence the environment around us.

It is time for my hair cut, and the barber cuts the first bits of my hair and I thought:

“An experience of a great looking hairstyle, starts from the first cut”

Oh Negative, Be Positive!

Take a look at this picture:

1. If you say you only see a circle, then you are divine.

2. If you say you see a circle with a black dot, then you are a normal human who sees both positive and negative and knows to differentiate between the two.

3. If you say you see a black dot in a circle, then you seem to be a kind of person who sees a negative factor amplified.

(This idea is not mine, it has been already projected in an old K.Balachander Movie, I don’t remember which one)

Now one would assume that a lot of us will fall under the Type 2. I am not a psychiatrist or a scientist or a zen monk who knows about such things, but it takes only a few observation at the blogosphere that we have a lot of people who are Type 3. One controversial post by a blogger is enough to get a flame war going in the comments section. Let me show a few examples and move on to what I want to say:

- My blog post on a song from Sakkarakatti: I am an A.R. Rehman fan. But it doesn’t mean that I will take everything coming my way from him. This album seems to have featured 2 songs from his older albums - Meenaxi and Rang de basanti and ARR is known to do that. So I put a big positive note saying that I loved the song “I miss you da” from that album, but I also made a slight pun by drawing a recycle logo for A as in A.R.Rehman. I got 2 comments saying I did a bad review and I didn’t know what I was reviewing. Well, I wasn’t reviewing at all, I was merely saying I loved a song, which was not commented.

- Hawkeyeview, recently reviewed the movie Dasavatharam. He gave a pretty bad rating for the movie since he thought so. He had the right to not like a movie based on what he saw. Well, for the most part I didn’t like the movie either and I came with something that was not a review. Hawkeyeview was bombarded with about 147 comments and I saw a lot of them like a huge blog post themselves, justifying why the movie is good. These are one timers, fanatics and when you are blinded by fanaticism you will not know where you go. Obviously, they might not have read any other blog posts that Hawkeyeview made, the fact that he disliked a movie out of several other things got him a shower of negative energy.

- 12th man, makes a humble post “Truly Indian” where he makes a statement and wishes that South Indians be learnt and respected for what they are. Well, I am not sure if he got a flame war or not, but I saw several comments that were like essays on his blog post. I am guessing some of them atleast were flames, as I didn’t read all of them.

Update: Here is one more example from the recent happenings in the blogland. The Paratha Wars!

This is what I want to say:

- Learn to see both positive things and negative things and try to differentiate.

- Destroy your negative feelings by breathing in and breathing out. Then, go home by picking the positive things that you read.

- If possible, convert the negative energy into humour or replace it by humour and laugh out loud.

- If you think something is good, there might be someone who thinks it is bad and that is ok. Learn to respect their opinions. Because ultimately what matters for you is what you think. If you liked something so be it, do not go around trying to convince others to like what you liked.

At the end of the day, we are just common people who blog about things that we think. Nothing more nothing less. Our intentions are not to hurt anyone, but to project what we feel. So, treat it light, treat it positive and move on in life, because there are lot of big picture things that we need to worry about or be happy about.

I am not perfect myself at this. Now if you excuse me, I myself have to go back and read what I wrote and try to practice it. Wise people say “Easier said than done”

Video: Tiger having a Ball

This is a video of a Tiger playing with a big ball. I took this a couple of months back at the Kansas city Zoo, Missouri.

You can also download the video in fully quality Quicktime/Apple TV Format at the Internet Archive.

Music Review: Saroja (missing Saaman)

“Saroja Saaman Nikalo” was a superhit song last year. My cousin proudly told me that her son is dancing for that song in the School Function, the last time I went to India. It was such a hit song and it reached almost everyone(ok atleast every college) in the state of Tamil Nadu. The team that made the hit movie Chennai 600 028 is back with another one called Saroja without the Saaman and the act of Nikalo. The music for the movie is composed by Yuvan Shankar Raja and I have to say the album is Missing the Saaman (meaning: The Thing, stuff).

Last year when I listened to Chennai 600 028 I was immediately attached to the songs - Jalsa and Yaaro. Jalsa was a fantastic “Hip Hop”ish number and Yaaro was an awesome romantic Duet. After watching the movie I totally understood the importance of the song - Saroja Saaman Nikalo and how much of a significant part it plays in the life of a youth( ). The album “Saroja” has nothing like that though. I was hardly attached to any of the songs on the first round of listening. But after listening to it a few times I did start liking a few of the songs.

Dost Bada Dost: This song celebrates friendship with a Soft Kuthu beats (equivalent of Soft Rock, and Yes I made that up). This song has the potential to get College students behind it. It will most probably be the “Mustafa” song of this decade (Remember Mustafa from Kadhal Desam in the late 90’s?). A good foot tapping number.

My Life: The song starts off in a Guns n Roses style guitar and vocals and moves on at the same Pace with some Aqua tunes fused in between. This song is completely out of context for a normal Tamil music Listener but I have to say it is one of the boldest attempts that Yuvan has made. Tanvi sings with an exhilarating tone and flows it beautifully with the guitar. An excellent piece and probably an item number, but who knows.

Cheeky Cheeky: Yuvan has mastered Hip Hop more than any other Indian Music directors (dare I say this?). His Hip hop is more “Hip Hop”ish and raw. Cheeky cheeky is going to win the hearts of the youth and some not so youth like me. It is a great pub song and I can see this being played in Discos and Five star hotels and clubs in Chennai.

What about the other songs in the album you ask? Well, Let’s just say they didn’t stick to me. They sounded mundane. May be you will like those, this is just my opinion and in any case we have to wait and see how the movie turns out to give the final judgement for an album. May be there is a “Saroja Saaman Nikalo” hidden in there.

Until then, I would say Saroja is a 50% Winner.

Updated: Album Link. You can listen to the low quality version there.

A Save Suggestion for WordPress

Dear WordPress,

Let me start by saying, I love wordpress.

You see like most peple, I like to save my posts and do some proof reading before publishing it. But I feel that the Save and Publish buttons are awfully close to each other that I am afraid if I sometimes accidentally might hit the other button instead of the one that needs to be. You never know when a mild earthquake or a small tornado can come by our way and shake our little hands causing us to go for the other button.

I did accidentally publish an article once, but it was thankfully 99% complete. In order to avoid any future accidents I would really appreciate it if you can move the save button

from here:

to somewhere here:

or anywhere else your manual for human interface guidelines will allow.

As always I love wordpress and continue loving so.

Yours Truly

Update: I have sent this as a suggestion to wordpress, let’s see.

Song: I miss you da

A.R. Rahman comes up with another of his Recycled album with the new movie Sakkarakatti (Which means Sugar Crystal). Sakkarakatti is a launchpad movie for K.Bhagyaraj’s son Shantanu and has songs remade from Meenakshi and Rang De Basanti. But there was one song named “I miss you da” and I really liked it for the deep and sexy beats. I am sure this song was also from one of his earlier movies, but I couldn’t tell which one. May be this one is an original in the album, or probably from one of his old telugu movies, whatever it may be, I really like this song and only this song from this album. If any of you happen to know the whereabouts of this song, please do let me know. This song will be innocent until it is proved guilty.

On a side note, if A.R. Rahman is going to recycle his old songs into any of his new movies then he should stamp this logo on the CDs.

You know, just like this one.

Fitness in the Clouds

If you were asked to come up with a photograph to campaign for Fitness, what would you do? Would you photograph Arnold or Stallone or Surya or Salman or yourself in the mirror?

Deepan Ramachandran goes out of the box and almost out of the world to get his ideas to the clouds. If you imagine the clouds as biceps and triceps in the sky then you are spotting muscles everywhere, was his idea. This Idea has got him the first prize in a campaign competition organized by Fitness one.

Deepan accepts the prize with a mention of credit to a little known Photographer friend of him Praveen. Praveen is my Younger Brother.

Congratulations Deepan on a victory over a great Idea and Great Job Praveen for a good Photograph that inspired the Idea.

The Ordeals of Grocery Shopping

In those days Grocery shopping was pretty easy. It usually involved only a few steps:

- Mom makes a list of things to buy in a sheet of paper.

- You take the shopping bag and walk to the store with the list of things and some money.

- You struggle a few minutes to get Balu, the Shopkeeper’s attention. This is the only tough part and requires some skill of Tamil Yelling and hand waving and saying “Anne”(Brother).

- You hand over the paper to Balu.

- Balu begins packing your list for you, while you count the stars during the day, look at the nearby wall poster of the latest Rajinikanth movie, try to put bracket for the girl next door who is standing near you.

- Balu completes and you walk away with the things.

The whole process is completely seamless, as in you don’t seem to have the need to bother about anything. Life was so simple in those days. It can also be pictorially represented as follows:

The figure is not to scale, but who cares really. It is just 2 boxes and arrows.

But now, to shop for Groceries requires Super Human powers. The steps are similar but they are laborious:

- Wife makes a list of things to buy in a sheet of paper/you bring wife with you.

- Drive the cart with kid on the front seat in a huge supermarket as big as a foot ball field.

- Look for signs to find where you get Coconut milk and end up in the Pets Aisle.

- Look for Icecream and end up in Greeting cards Aisle.

- Lose track of where your wife is and go up and down the aisles looking for her, while kid is getting tired of simply sitting in the cart and trying to do the Minority Report Stunt.

- Deciding on which brand of items to buy.

- Read Ingredients and Reject items with High Fructose Corn Syrup as per Dr. Oz’s advice from the Oprah Winfrey Show.

- Count calories from Fat and Sugar on the label using complex abstract algebra with differential equations and transformed with Lagrange’s theorem.

- check expiry dates on each item.

- Mathematically and logically compute which cashier’s lane will move you faster.

- Ransack your wallet to decide which credit/debit card to use.

The list goes on.

There are so many things that the super market carry, you just wish that there was a Google Grocery. A web based tool for your mobile phone to show you the shortest distance to the item you are looking for in Aisle 7, or you just feed the list of things and Google Grocery gives you the shortest distance map of all the things. Of course, there will be ads of nearby and related items and you shouldn’t be distracted by that. But one such thing like Google Grocery is needed for us dear shoppers. If Google doesn’t come up with one then we will all have to evolve Supervision, which will help us track down the items that we need through our high powered Supervision Eyes, like the Terminator Robot.

But until then a common man like us will have to suffer the ordeal of grocery shopping and here is how i will pictorially represent it:

Legend:

Blue Rectangular Strips - Aisles of racks with grocery items

Yellow Rectangular Strips - Cashier Lines

Yellow Star - You are Here (Duh!)

Green Diamond - You need to be here.

Red circle with a strike - You don’t need to be here but you will end up being all over here more than once.

Little blue square - 100x Magnified view of your house.

The grocery store will be gigantically huge that your house will be just a dot when compared to the store’s size. In order for your naked eye to catch the glimpse of your house a 100x magnifying glass provides the necessary enlargement for your viewing pleasure. This makes the diagram not to scale.

Good luck with your next grocery shopping. If you have more fun facts and ideas about this please feel free to drop in your comments.

Mini Review: Jaane Tu Ya Jaane Na

Jaane Tu Ya Jaane Na means “Whether You know it or not”. The movie is probably watched by a lot already and reviewed a lot and hence I am not going to repeat the same thing. I will just summarize a few things in the name of the review, I am not a professional reviewer anyway:

1. It is a “Comedy Romance Comedy” genre movie and you will know why when you watch the movie, A love story of the following kind:

The Figure is not to scale.

“What’s this” you ask? It is a table spoon full of sugar with christmas ornaments on it and an army of ants being attracted to the sweetness and transporting it to their food reserve. Still don’t know “What’s this”, then you gotta watch the movie.

2. I had mentioned a while back how Genelia can spring into acting in an annoying way, but she wasn’t as annoying in this movie. I guess the director had the say in it.

3. Imran Khan is to Aamir Khan as how Colin Hanks is to Tom Hanks. Even though Imran exhibits a lot of his uncle’s characteristics, mannerism and style in his acting he will do great if he chooses his movies well. He has got a good future in the Movies. It is hard to shed the family background, but Imran doesn’t need to as he seems to have potential.

4. AR Rahman rocks. I guess my Psychosongasticism will transfer from Om Zaara Re to Pappu cant dance:

Daughter puts her pretend phone on my ears and I say “Hello… What? Pappu cant dance?”.

Daughter brings her puppy doll to me to play with and I sing “Puppy cant dance …dance ..dance…!”

You get the idea.

Finally there is an equivalent to “Saroja Samaan Nikalo” in Hindi.

5. The best scene of the movie is when Naseeruddin Shah Laughs and Dances. This was very funny. Paresh Rawal had a meaty part and was funny as usual.

6. The funniest scene in the movie was the Climax. I have not seen anything like this before (wait, am I lying as in a Liar and another Liar ?) in a Romantic Comedy. It was fitting and orchestrated very well. All credit goes to the director for this.

7. The movie is of the calibre of “Dil Chahta Hai” not just because of a similar Screenplay, not just because of a similar story of relationships, not just because there is a character of an amazing painter, but because of all these reasons and how well the screenplay is handled. There was little bit of a drag in the second half but the movie quickly recovered and went full pace later.

Verdict: Winner. You gotta watch this movie.

The Barrel Train Express

I saw this train at the local Kansas city Farmer’s Market in the Downtown. It was a very simple and innovative idea. A John Deere farm equipment (lawn mover/tractor that is, Please correct me if I am wrong as I am not familiar with these) is converted into the train’s engine and connected to a long steel rail with wheels. On top of this is the compartments of half cut barrel. Kids were enjoying the train ride. Innovation is what this is called and our innovation obsessed IT HR and Managers should make a note of this. I will let the picture do the rest of the talking:

The Minority Report Stunt

When Tom Cruise gets accused for a future murder that he is yet to do, he has no other choice but to run. In the movie Minority Report Tom says “Everybody Runs” and takes off into the futuristic Lexus car on the multidirectional freeway. But when his car gets taken over by the system, he just gets out of it and jumps on to another. This is one of the best action sequences I have ever seen because even though Speilberg works so much to show how a futuristic highway looks like, in the end it is completely the physical effort of the protagonist to perform the action in the chase.

As I was doing my weekend grocery shopping the other day, I was walking down the aisles trying find the things in my list. My daughter was enjoying the shopping cart ride but quite soon she seemed to be getting bored. She begged for attention and invited some gimmicks out of me as I continued my futile search of Vegetable Stock.

She then slowly pulled her legs out of the front opening and crouched on the seat holding the bar in front. From the crouch position she lifted herself up still holding the bar and gave a shout. I looked at her and politely asked her to sit down and continued glancing the racks for vegetable stock. She then released her hold on the bar and just as I started pushing the cart, she did a slight jump and reached me and grabbed me by her arms around my neck.

That was one hell of a Minority Report Stunt.

The iPhone Line in India

We all know that when there is a new Tech gadget in the horizon people line up lusting for it days before its release. Game consoles like PS3, XBOX 360 and Wii all went through that and iPhone is no stranger to this phenomenon. People lined up for iPhone 1.0 as much as 1 week before the launch. iPhone 3G is also going through the same demand and we see people lining up for the gadget from Newzealand (Who will be the first to get the iPhone, with regards to Timezone) to Newyork City, already for the friday July 11th launch.

I already wrote about how iPhone would play an important role in Indian Politics. It is now time to ponder over the concept of an iPhone line before the launch. Will we, as Indians in India do the same? Will we line up for iPhone in the Malls, at Airtel booths? Here are somethings that can happen around the concept of iPhone lines in India.

- First of all, there will be no line. There will be lines as in Plural. People will start their own line in their own direction complying to Vaastu shastra. It will just be a bunch of people waiting to barge in as soon as the doors swing open. The line will actually be a pseudo line. It will be so random, Apple can use it as a tagline for its iPod Shuffle - “Line is Random”.

- The first few in the line will know that the line is for iPhone and then the rest would be standing there just out of curiosity as to why the place is so crowded, which generates more marketing hype. As Tamil Comedian Vivek says “If there is crowd anywhere, we have to go there to watch what is happening. This is our culture!”

- Roadside tea shops and Idli shops will erupt in order to cash in on the adhoc business that the crowd would generate. The prices will be steadily inflated as the crowd grows and as people need to stick to their spot if they had any dream of holding their position. 20% of the revenue will go the local dhadha and 10% will go to the local R1 police station.

- In order to generate more demand, the local marketing whiz kids would announce a free movie ticket for the first show of the latest Rajinikanth Flick Kuselan for every iPhone purchase, which will result in Rajinikanth fans erecting a cut out of the superstar holding the iPhone, near the mall and perform rituals like Paal Abishekam, Garlanding, Falling at his feet and bursting fire crackers.

- To control the crowd, a special delegate of personnels will arrive from Tirumala Tirupathi to lend their experienced pair of hands. They will be employed near every turn of the serpentine queue and at the Mall entrance and will be found practicing the word “Jarigandi” “Jaragandi” (which means Keep moving).

The real scene will start when the gates are open. People will start pushing from the back of the line even though there is absolutely no possibility of movement in the front. The above mentioned Queue Handling personnels will strictly restrict 10 seconds to each person within which the person will be given the iPhone and billed, before uttering the word “Jarigandi” “Jaragandi”.

The only chance of surviving in the queue will be to just stand where you are and let yourself be pushed and carried through the line till you enter the gate for your 10 seconds of iPhone darshan and retreival. Any attempt to fool the system or work your way around it will either result in serious injuries or be thrown out of the queue, after which you will have to join the queue from the end and repeat the process all over again.

The ordeal will be so painful than listening to Vogon Poetry and as time goes by you will simply accept the fact of being in the queue and will just hold your wallet in the back pocket of your jeans at an awkward position, to fend off the pick pocketers and keep moving.

Yes, In India, the line always keeps moving, whether you do or not.